Moving forward.

I'm baaaaaack!

I feel terrible for not writing on here in so long but the truth is, I just haven't had much to write about. When I started this blog, it was to share my recovery and vent a little about everything that was going on. Now that I'm done with surgeries and physical therapy, I just haven't really decided what to write. Hopefully, that will change. And soon.

I finally have a job again! Waitressing at a sports bar in New Braunfels. It feels so great to be working! I missed making my own money. And I forgot how much I actually liked to work. I was a little nervous at first because I'm not used to walking a lot. Wasn't quite sure how my legs would handle it. Surprisingly, my legs are doing fantastic! It's actually my feet that hurt more than anything. This is the most I've walked or stood in a really long time. I've tried a bunch of different shoes with no luck on the outcome of pain at the end of my shifts. I'm slowly building my tolerance back up, but I'm sure it will still take a while.

My living arrangements are about to change too! After living with my family for almost the past 2 years, I'm finally moving back out in August and getting a place with a friend. I'm beyond excited! Not that I don't love living with my family, I'm just glad to actually have my own little home again. And the best part about it, it's RIGHT on the river. Eek, I'm so pumped! I also want to blow up pictures my x-rays onto canvas' and hang them on my walls. I think that would be a neat thing to do with them and they're unique!

I had a doctor's appointment this morning with my orthopedic doctor. Just a check up to see how my legs are doing and great news, they're doing great! I was a little concerned because now I have a job and have been using them a lot more, but working has actually strengthened them up a bit! I was relieved to hear that. He said that I can pretty much do whatever I want. Minus running. I can't ever run again. Which I'm really okay with because I've never been a runner. The cadaver ligaments in my knees are holding together very nicely too! For those of you who don't know, a cadaver is a corpse. Meaning, I have a dead person's ligaments. I'm not sure of a better way to put that. Anywho, I'm beyond thankful for the donor. And I actually got the idea today to maybe see who the person was. It's not like major organs or anything but without that person donating, my knees wouldn't be working like they do now. If I decided to look them up, I'm not even really sure what I would do with the information. We shall see!

After my doctor's appointment, I stopped by my physical therapy place. It's always great to see everyone that works there! I really, really miss that place. From going there 3 times a week to not going at all, is just weird to me. It almost feels like I have a hole in my schedule. I can't believe that when I started going there, I was in a wheelchair. And in a wheelchair for 5 more months after that. They gave me the strength I needed to get my legs strong enough to walk again. And then they retaught me how to walk. I will never forget that. They are all truly amazing people and I'm so glad to have met them!

I think I've covered a lot of the stuff that's been going on the past few months. So glad that my life is finally getting back to some sort of normal. Still can't believe that it's almost been 2 years since my accident but I think I'm doing really well considering! I'm a very, very happy lady!

I'm going to try my best to keep up with my blog. Maybe I'll start putting reminders in my phone. Don't worry, I'll figure out a good solution and it won't take me as long to write new posts.

"Life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful."

Xoxo.

Don't follow me, I'm lost.

Where to begin, where to begin....

It's been 3 weeks since my last day of physical therapy and I'm not going to lie, I miss it. Way more than I ever thought I was going to. It almost feels like a little piece of me is missing now. Never thought I would get so attached to it. But I love and miss it. And everyone that worked there too!

I've been walking a lot lately. My neighborhood has a ton of hills so it makes it a little more challenging than just walking around a boring track. I've been trying to walk at least 2 miles every day. And I actually made a 4 mile walk to a friends house not too long ago. It definitely wasn't easy but I didn't give up. I'm stubborn. By the end of it, I didn't think it was too bad but the few days after, I was extremely sore. The kind of sore I got the day I switched from my wheelchair to my walker. Whew! Kinda teared up just thinking about that. Still can't believe there was a point in time where I couldn't walk.

I have one medical bill left and there's only a few hundred dollars left on it. I have the greatest parents in the world for helping me out through all of this. I seriously don't know what I would do without them. They were so thoughtful to help me with the bills. I'm glad I'm not in debt, it's a huge relief.

I thought by now I'd have a job. Nope. I'm really no where near where I thought I would be by now. I haven't been looking for a job because I have no transportation, which has really sucked. I went to apply at a little cafe down the street from where I live, and I chickened out. For some reason, I was extremely nervous. My face was getting red and I was starting to feel sick. I don't know how I could possibly be nervous to apply for a waitress job. I was a waitress for almost 3 years, and a good one too! I even did promotions for our store and was a trainer. So I don't really understand my nerves. I guess since I haven't worked in almost 16 months, it's a little more nerve-racking than I thought it was going to be. Or maybe I'm just afraid I'll mess up. Oh well, hopefully these damn nerves go away soon. I really miss working.

I'll try to write in here more often. Promise!

"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind."
- C.S. Lewis

Xoxo.

The end is near.

So as most of you who read my blog know, I got in a car accident 12/06/10 and have been recovering from it ever since. As of yesterday, it's officially been 15 months. While I'm not exactly 100% back to normal, I think I'm pretty darn close! I still get really tired if I stand too long and if I sit to long, my legs get stiff. But hey, those are two very minimal things considering how far I've come!

Tomorrow will be my last day of physical therapy! I can't believe it! I'm actually more sad than excited. I'm going to miss that place. A lot. By the way, the last time that I had therapy, I RAN! Well, kinda sorta ran. I had both of my knee braces on so it was an awkward, slow, waddle-ish run. But I still did it!

My next, and hopefully last, doctors appointment is on May 31st. Yes, that's also my birthday! I can't wait to see what my doctor has to say about my legs!

Now it's time to get my life back together. Not sure what I should start with. I need to get a new gym membership, get a new vehicle, find a job, save up money, and find a place to live! Seems like this will take a while but I'm determined to get it all done as soon as possible!

I plan on losing at least 15 pounds by my birthday and getting into the best shape I possibly can. I really need to start tanning too! Ghost white does not look good on me. But tanning isn't a priority, at all.

It's kinda hard to get a job when I don't have a vehicle, yet, I can't buy a vehicle without having a job. Vicious cycle but hopefully I get both sooner rather than later.

"Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out."

- John Wooden

Xoxo.

Where do I go from here?

As I'm getting closer and closer to the end of my recovery, I keep coming back to the same question. Where do I go from here? My life was so much different before my accident.

I'm walking a lot better than I ever could have hoped for. I've pushed and pushed myself to get to this point. It's been a really long journey and oddly enough, I'm kinda sad to see it coming to an end. Wow, that's something I never thought I'd say.

So where do I go from here?

I need a vehicle, job, money saved up, and a place to live. In that order, kinda.

I finally got released to work. I've been waiting for this for a long time and honestly, I'm scared out of my mind. I love to work, I really do. I'm a workaholic. But it's been almost 15 months since I've actually worked. I haven't applied for jobs or been to an interview in almost 4 years. My last job, I had for a long time but I don't want to go back there. Actually, I refuse to go back. But now I have no idea where I actually want to get a job. Or where I can get a job. I can't have a job sitting down all day, or standing all day, or even walking all day. So what do I do? Where can I find a job where I can do a little of all three? Help!

I have kinda been debating on going back to school too. I'm not entirely sure what I want to do. There's a few things I have in mind but I guess I'll have to figure all of that out when the time comes! Hopefully I can find something that I will actually want to stick with. I don't want to go to school and then change my major a thousand times. I hate wasting money and time. We shall see how things turn out!

Until then, I'll keep asking the same question I've been asking myself....

Where do I go from here?

Xoxo.

All I can do is be me.

I have so much I've been wanting to blog about! I'm so glad that my computer is temporarily working again. Hopefully it'll continue to work so I won't have to go so long between blog posts.

First order of business:

I'm curious to know if I have "I'm handicapped, please pick a fight and/or be rude to me!" Seriously. It's starting to get really annoying and frustrating. I don't think I'm at all mean to anyone in any way, yet I feel like a lot of people have been more rude to me than ever in my entire life. It makes no sense. Is it just because I'm an easy/slow target? Do they pick fights because they know I can't fight back? I seriously can't risk messing up my legs. After 4 surgeries and over a year of physical therapy, I don't really want to do this all over again. I guess I just will never understand the way people's minds work. If being rude to me is the only way for you to feel better about yourself, then I seriously feel bad for you.

Enough about that.... I just really needed to get that off my chest.

Physical therapy has been going pretty good. Though, I've been an emotional roller coaster there lately. I'm not sure if I'm just finally getting exhausted of all of this recovering, or what not. I have no idea. I don't seem to ever want to go. Maybe it's just because I've been sick lately or because a lot has been going on. I'm not really sure. I hope I get out of this funk and physical therapy will start being more exciting to me again.

I was asked last time at kneehab, what my future goals were as far as being able to do things again. For some reason, my mind went completely blank. When I first started going to therapy, my goal was to walk again. Mission accomplished! But I never really thought further than that. I'm not really into sports and my doctor said I shouldn't take up running or jogging because it could just mess up my knees quicker. So what can't I do now that I could do before? The only things that I could really think of were walking/standing for long periods of time and wearing heels. Oh how I miss wearing heels. I have so many gorgeous heels that I can no longer wear. I'm now stuck wearing flats. Not as fun or pretty. Just boring flats. Which makes everyone think that I've shrunk. Nope, I've always been 5 foot. But now I can't even fool anyone! Ha!!!!

On a more positive note than the rest of this, have I ever told y'all how much I adore my friends? I think I might be the luckiest girl in the world to have them! They've stuck by me through all of this and made my recovery road a million times better than I thought it was going to be. I don't even know how I'll ever repay them for all that they've done. I love each and every one of you, from the bottom of my heart. And don't ever forget that!

Also, a friend of mine asked me to make headbands for a charity's silent auction that she's helping out with. I'm really looking forward to making them! Anything I can do to give back, always makes my heart happy. I can't wait to get them all done and mail them to her!

Xoxo.

Mandicapped.

As most of you know, I've been calling myself Iron Man-dy a lot. Almost every single time I go to therapy or the gym. Well, the other day my dear friend, Kyle, came up with mandicapped. And I absolutely love it! Makes me giggle every time I say it.

I went to the doctor on Thursday, which is always kinda scary because I'm never sure what he's going to say. Sometimes the news is good and sometimes it's not. Luckily for me, this time the news was great! I no longer have to wear my right knee brace anymore!!!! Well, unless I'm doing physical activities such as going to the gym or physical therapy. But I'm thrilled about being able to leave my house without it!

I go back to the doctor on my birthday, May 31st, to see how my legs are doing and discuss whether or not I can stop wearing the left brace. I think I can manage wearing it a little bit longer! My doctor also said that I can start taking spin classes! I can't wait to start going!

In other, non medical related news, I've decided to open an Etsy shop. I know I've said it before and then backed out of it, but this time, I'm serious! I've been making my headbands and bows since my accident and I have so many that I'm running out of room to put all of them. And I really want people to have my little creations. So stay tuned on the shop opening! I'm really excited about it!

Here's a few of my many creations:

  

 

"It is not what happens to you but how you respond to what happens to you."

Xoxo.

The Giving Keys.

Ah! I finally got my The Giving Keys necklace in the mail the other day and I haven't taken it off since! I'm in love. Right when I heard about this non-profit organization, I couldn't wait to buy a necklace of my own. I am a huge supporter of non-profit organizations and I always love it when I find/heard about new ones!

When I first heard about The Giving keys, I immediately knew what word I wanted. I chose the word "STRENGTH" for my key because, as most of you who read my blog know, I've had to overcome a lot the past 13 and a half months. Emotionally and physically. Everyone that I have talked to about my car accident and injuries, has always told me that they really admire my strength. Even though they might not know it, that really helped me out a lot. I never knew how strong I could be until this happened. I can't wait to give my key away to someone that I feel needs the message just as much as I did. I know that whomever I give it to, will love it just as much as I do! And trust me, I'll be buying plenty more with other words on them. They will make the greatest gifts!

Pay It Forward

One thing I loved the most about this organization is that you get to create you own 8 letter word to have put on the key and at some point in time you have to give it away to a person you feel needs the message on your key. Once you've done that, you go and write on the website the story of why you gave it away. How great is that? I really think that one simple little word could completely change someone's day or even life.

All proceeds of The Giving Keys go to keeping a homeless couple of the streets and giving them a better life. On the website, it gives you updates on how the couple is doing and what they've accomplished since they became a part of the organization. I love knowing that my purchase has really helped out and the updates make it that much better.

To read more about this great non-profit organization, check out there website which I have listed below.

And go purchase your own beautiful necklace right now! Do it.

The Giving Keys Info

Website

Twitter

Facebook

Xoxo.

Two Thousand Twelve.

I've been meaning to write a post about the new year but haven't gotten around to it until today, day 10 of 2012. Better late than never, right? I changed the name of my blog and my blog template for the new year. Not sure if I really like either of the changes I made yet, but I can always change it later if I decide I don't.

2011 Recap:

2011 had many, many ups and downs for me. The year, for me, was consumed by doctor visits, surgeries, recovering, and lots of physical therapy. When it started off, I was very bitter and still going through the stress of my life completely changing. I now know that it changed for the better. I started off the year in a wheelchair and ended it walking on my own. How awesome is that? Not that I was never going to walk again, I was just never sure how long it was going to take to have everything completely fixed. Those of you who know me, know that I was determined to have my legs completely fixed before 2011 was over. I still have tons of physical therapy to do, but everything is fixed. Mission accomplished! I realized that I have some of the greatest friends in the world, I'm more than lucky to have them. I met a ton of really amazing people that I'm very proud to call friends now. I've become a lot closer to my family and I'm glad that I've gotten the opportunity to get to know them better and learn things that I never knew about them. Through everything that I have gone through, I found myself again. I'm happy, happier than I've ever been. I've tried new things. Crafting and reading are now my two biggest obsessions/hobbies. All in all, the year was a million times more fantastic than I could have ever imagined. I'm thankful for everything that happened in 2011.

2012:

There is a lot of things that I want to accomplish in new year. I've never really been one to make New Year's Resolutions, or anything of the sort, but since I have a lot that I truly need to get done this year, I thought I'd make a list of everything that I really want/need to get done before this year is over.

My Goals For 2012:

- Get a job.

Still can't believe it's been over a year since I've actually worked. I really miss it.

- Pay off my loan.

One less thing to pay a month will really help me out in the future.

- Get a new car.

Since Dora, yes I named my Explorer Dora, went out with a bang, I've been car-less. And I can't stand it.

- Save up at least $2,000.

When I first moved out when I was 18, I had no money saved up. And I always wished that I had actually thought about saving money before I moved out, instead of being in a big hurry to grow up.

- Get in good physical shape/lose weight.

Before you read this and tell me "you don't need to lose weight" or whatever else you might say, save it. I have a mirror and know what I look like. I'm not saying that I'm super overweight or anything, but I have gained a lot of weight since my car accident and I will feel a million times better once it's all gone. Plus, I can't stand exercising, so I've never really been in "good" shape and I would really like for that to change.

- Eat healthier.

I've never been a healthy eater. Which can cause a ton of health problems if I continue to eat all the greasy junk that I usually eat. I've actually been eating a lot more vegetables and fruits lately, I'm proud of that and plan on eating even more than I already do. I want to cut out my butter intake, greasy foods, fried foods, salt, etc.

- Take classes at the gym.

Once it starts to get hotter outside, I plan on taking water aerobics classes. Yes, I know what you're thinking, "that's what old people do". But it will be really, really good for my legs. And water aerobics is a good and easy way to get/stay in shape. I also want to take spin classes, but I can't even attempt to do those until my physical therapist says that my legs are strong enough to do that.

- Take lots and lots of road trips.

Road trips have always been one of my favorite things to do. There's something really soothing about driving to far places that you don't normally go to.

- Be more creative.

I've been making a lot of crafts that I have found the tutorials for online, but I would really like to completely create something on my own.

- Make a list of crafts and do every single one of them.

I want to make a scrapbook of every craft that I want to make and put the tutorial on there too, once I've completed the craft, I'm going to put a picture of it on the page with the tutorial. That way I'll always have something to go back to for a reference.

- Help others.

I'm going to start looking into a bunch of different non-profit organizations and start doing this one soon.

Not too crazy of a list, just some things that are really important to me. I don't think that any of them are too unreasonable and I really hope to accomplish every single one of them.

Xoxo.

These legs were made for walkin'.

And that's just what they'll do....

Whew, now that that's out of my system.... For everyone that has been keeping up with my long road of surgeries and recovering, I want you all to know that my legs are doing fantastic! My left leg is recovering a lot faster than I had expected it to, which is always great news to me. I still can't believe that I'm finally done with all of my surgeries and am finally walking on my own again. No more wheelchair, walker, or crutches. I'm done with all of them, and let me tell you, there's no greater feeling than walking on my own again! I still have to wear both of my knee braces for a few more months, but that's perfectly fine with me!

Physical therapy has been going great! I'm finally back to my little routine of going. 3 times a week. Which I love going, even though sometimes I don't act like it. I know that every time I go, I'm getting more and more stronger. And how awesome is that? I'm truly one lucky lady to have such amazing people help me with everything. Anywho, I think both of my legs are finally straight! All the prone hangs and other exercises that I do to make them straight have finally paid off. They're both bending really good but I was never too worried about that.

In other news, I've been crafting a LOT lately. I have a million crafts that I want to do, my head feels like it might explode! It doesn't help that I'm slightly addicted to Pinterest. I have a list of things that I want to make, and I'll post pictures as I get them done. I can't wait to see how everything turns out! I love creating things.

Here's a few of my recent creations:

Mod Podge Glitter Shoes

Before:

After:

These were really fun to make and I think they turned out pretty good considering I had never tried anything like this before. They were the perfect shoes to wear for the holidays! I can't wait to make a bunch more. I want to make them in every color of glitter I can find!

Homemade Air Fresheners

I made these in lavender scent and made them a bit too strong. The tutorial that I read said to put in 30 drops of the essential oil, but when I turned the bottle over, a bunch of it poured out! I was really excited when I woke up and saw that they gelled perfectly. And now that it's been a few days since I made them, they're not as strong and are actually starting to smell really good!

Melting Crayons

Before:

After:

When I first saw this project, I thought, "Melting crayons! How simple!". Man oh man, was I wrong! It took forever for the crayons to melt. I didn't anticipate that at all. It was a lot messier than I thought too. I put a bunch of paper down under the canvas because I was concerned about it dripping on the floor. I never anticipated on the melted crayon shooting off to the sides. Lesson learned! It was really fun to make though and I love how it turned out.

I can't wait to craft some more and post pictures of my creations!

"To practice any art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow. So do it."

- Kurt Vonnegut

Xoxo.